Saturday, November 8, 2014

Belated Birth Story

First, I must backtrack:

My first experience with child birth, 6 years ago, was horrific! It was an induction that led to a c-section, which was botched horribly! I felt the entire experience and seen WAY too much of my own blood for comfort. (Technically, they should have given me a transfusion) I had such a horrible experience as a patient that I decided that I was dropping out of nursing school.
Don't get me wrong, the nurses were great being there for me when my husband was ordered out of the room, but I seen how helpless they were in not being able to stop the horror show or fully acknowledge the severity of the situation to me. I later had one of the nurses, who knew my husband from a previous church they attended, tell me that it was the worst experience she has had in the OR.

I spent about 8 days in the hospital with high blood pressure issues and swelling. I think I deleted all my hospital pics but one bc I was horrified looking at myself. It was bad ya'll!

I spent hours in recovery. I think it was 4 hours before I got to hold my baby! By that time, they had given her formula, and said she had re-flux. I was so beaten down at that point, I didn't even try to breastfeed.

This experience left me scarred. Physically, emotionally, mentally. It took way longer to recover than it was needed. I almost had a bought of PPD because I was so upset that I was not able to take care of my baby. Looking back, of course, I am super thankful that my mother-in-law and husband did everything for her. If I had tried, I probably would have been back in the hospital. At the time though, I just wanted to be the one to go to her when she cried, Instead, I was stuck in bed.

Now, fast forward to about a year ago, to the moment I found out I was pregnant. I was shocked because, well, we weren't trying to prevent it for 5 years and nothing ever happened. I had almost come to a conclusion that I wasn't able to anymore. Obviously, not the case!
As I stared at the lines, I was overcome with fear. I did NOT want to experience anything near what happened before.
I began researching doctors in my area, and finally made an appointment. I fell in LOVE with all of them and their midwife at the doctor office I chose. They were so great throughout the entire experience. Now, my pregnancy this time around was no walk in the park. I wasn't prepared for that. My first had been morning sickness in the beginning and nothing more. This one decided to KO me every single day.

I was due on June 6. Scheduled for a c-section for May 27. However, I started showing signs of Pre-eclampsia. I  had been swelling for a while, but it had only recently started causing my BP to go up. I did the 24 hour urine collection, and on my way to the office, they called to tell me just drop it off at the hospital.
I couldn't leave until results came back. They went ahead and took my BP and had me lay down. They hooked my up to a fetal monitor as we waited also.
My doctor had been called there to deliver another patients baby. He sent word that he would check on me when he finished up. Well, as soon as he left me, I started contracting. I thought for sure they were BHicks and wasn't timing them or anything. I guess I should have been because by the time my doctor came back, I was having them every minute.
Baby wanted to come now. Guess she figured, why waste a trip to the hospital?

I was prepped for my c-section and when the spinal was given and I felt everything go numb, I almost cried. My doctor said, "See, I didn't break my promise." (I had made him promise on my first visit he would make sure I was numb)
The next thing I know, I hear my beautiful baby cry out. After cutting the cord, they laid her on my chest, and I kissed her what seemed like a thousand times. They took her to be cleaned up as the doctor finished up.
It took a little longer because A.) I was going to have a tubal. NO more baby surprises for me! and B.) He found lots of scar tissue, especially on my bladder. He said the previous doctor cut way too deep and hacked my bladder and it was covered in scar tissue,
After he finished, I was wheeled to recovery for an hour and baby & daddy waited in the nursery for me.
I got a comfy room and was allowed my sweet baby. I began breastfeeding her, and had no trouble at all.
Everything this time around was so much smoother! Was it consolation for such a cruddy pregnancy? Probably not. No, I think my wonderful doctor helped me with an easy c-section and fast recovery.
2 days is all I spent it the hospital with her. I never even had to see the LC because breastfeeding went (and is still going) smoothly.
Good doctors make a difference!
Here is big sister, MaKenzie with her baby sister, Alexis upon our homecoming.

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Pregnant & miserable

First off: Today, I am officially 34 weeks pregnant.
This pregnancy has been miserable! And I know, it is a miracle to create life but this is the truth. Pregnancy is no fun.
There hasn't been a 'pregnancy glow' this time around...only the glisten of sweat from this Georgia heat. My skin didn't get healthy, it got acne, which i never had problems with. There has been no food indulgence, only food aversions. There's only backaches & fatigue left now as I finally did get over morning sickness, at the 7 month mark.
*Note to those who never experienced morning sickness: please don't comment about this to a woman who can't stop hugging the toilet. We just want to slap you.
Anyway, as I was saying. I did stop feeling the urge to puke..it was short lived. My Dr put me on iron & no matter what I try, insta-sickness arises. Just great.
Heartburn for no good reason. What's up with that?
And all my weight loss from last year has been nullified by the gain at this point. My body is sick of being big. You point out that many women stay fit during pregnancy? Well, good for them. This girl has backaches & muscle aches & cramps enough. How can I enjoy a run with sciatic nerve making me about fall out every 2 seconds? I can't even up one flight of stairs without needing a breather at this point. I couldn't imagine trying to run with this mountain belly. No, this is not a fit pregnancy. But oh. Treadmill, how I miss thee.
Every moment feels like I could pass out from exhaustion. Cooking & cleaning sessions are sparse to say the least. The only time I don't feel tired? Bedtime. Insomnia keeps me up all night and exhaustion keeps me down all day. Ridiculous!
I tell myself this will all be over soon. And finally, that is becoming a real statement. Inching closer is the ever imminent arrival date of our second daughter, Alexis Madison. And the moment I hold her, I know, all of this will not matter. Because, every miserable moment is worth the miracle of a child.

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

My 2013 Rollercoaster of a Year in Review

Another year is ending. Another year beginning with so many changes coming with it. Looking back & ahead:
2013
At the beginning of the year, we were still settling in to our new town. I still was wanting to conceive a second child, which seemed impossible. I was sad at every start of my period. My husband, of course, was telling me to put it in God's hands.
As the year progressed, I came to terms with not getting pregnant & decided to focus on getting healthy. I lost at least 10 pounds (I rarely step on scales). I begin to consistently pray for God's will in my life rather than praying for what I wanted. I signed my little girl up for public kindergarten, something I never imagined doing. (She loves it)
And then I decided I wanted a change. I went back to school for accounting - something else I never imagined doing, and I begin to think about getting my tubes tied... God had different plans!
Finding out I was pregnant came with a mix of emotions because I felt I had just accepted after all these years & moved on. It only took a few days before I was in a better state of mind. I had prayed for God's will, & this is i Everything is on His time & not mine & I have to accept that! So I started my new classes with extreme morning sickness & fatigue, but I made it thru my semester & signed up for more.
I don't know how long this new degree will take now that I am once again going to be in college with a baby, but it will be worth it to finally get a career I want.
2014
The year starts off with my ultrasound on the 9th. Can't wait for that! I will start my second semester of accounting that week as well & MaKenzie goes back to school. So that will be a busy week.
I have so much preparation for the baby to do. I don't want to procrastinate. I always do that, but I feel like if I do that then my schooling will suffer. So, I will have my crib set up & all the supplies bought with plenty of time to spare--I hope.
Welcoming a new baby in time for MaKenzie's summer vacation will give her plenty of time to bond with the baby. It will also mean no lugging a new born for pick up & drop offs. For that, I am grateful!
I really don't know what to expect of this year. Life with 2 kids and not living near family intimidates me a bit, I can't lie. All I can do is continue to pray for God's will & ask Him to guide me on this journey.
So.
Happy New Year & God bless. May this year bring you all you many more happy memories.

Sunday, December 29, 2013

After admitting I needed help with the nausea and spending Christmas in the hospital, I think I am finally getting better. Today was my first day without the nausea. No home remedies or RX meds! Praying it keeps getting better on its own!!
That was officially the worst Christmas ever.
I can't wait for my ultrasound on the 9th! Feeling the baby move (& it moves constantly) has made it a reality that this is happening. I am going to be a mommy of 2 soon!
MaKenzie is still super excited & still telling everyone it is a girl. I decided to let her come along for the ultrasound. I will have to get her from school about an hour early, but I think it will be worth it for her to share that memory......& if it is a boy, the Dr will be the 1 breaking her heart with the news--not mommy! Lol.

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Pregnancy Dreams

OK...so everyone knows pregnant ladies have the craziest dreams ever & I just had a strange one!
I honestly just dreamed I was being eaten. By a person...
In it, I was sleeping & woke up to some crazy person chewing on me. I managed to break free & run to my husband & wake him up. He punches the guy & the crazy person runs off.

Yeah. So strange that I googled the whole "meaning if a dream" thing. Turns out, to dream about being eaten by a cannibal means that something in your life is draining your energy..or something to that degree.
Hmm...I have a feeling it could be that I am 17 weeks pregnant with this constant sickness. That is TOTALLY draining!
I dunno if I would rather deal with the insomnia or the weird dreams at this point if they are getting this off the wall.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Pregnancy Update

I went to the doctor & found out that I am only 6 weeks along. However, there was a heartbeat, which was a big sigh of relief since I had some bleeding.
They printed out a pic of my lil piece of rice. Lol. My daughter seen it & was like "Cool. My sister!" Technically, it isn't a girl or boy yet I suppose, but I know what she is hoping for!

Yesterday was my first day feeling pregnant. Nausea and committing are not fun! But totally worth it in the end. And what a long way to go.

Saturday, September 21, 2013